wat bout pragnant strippers??
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Life is so much better after having sex.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
