theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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