We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
