i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
