no. you can't hotbox the world.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
