Screwed.edu
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize