so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize