Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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