I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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