at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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