I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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