nut hugger
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize