You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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