I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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