Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
