I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
