i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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