I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Did I show you my penis last night?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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