I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
