lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Randomize
