My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
i think my cat just said my name.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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