You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
