I will die if light touches me.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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