...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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