Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize