Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
