So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
