hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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