office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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