ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
