we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
