I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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