ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
