My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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