he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
There's always time for handjobs
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
