Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
