why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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