Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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