I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize