I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
