can we get nightvision for the apartment?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
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