Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize