Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
just tell him i said nine months
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
