Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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