Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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