It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
