GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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