Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
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