he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
