everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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